Saturday, December 1, 2012

Home Alone

Chance had been planning on staying over Mason and Mandy’s.  I love it when they spend time together.

Chance and I share a car so I dropped him off, hung out then drove back home.

Then I was alone….. it seemed VERY quiet.  Too quiet.  Not only SOUNDED different, it FELT different.  All of a sudden I was aware of all the noise that should be here… but isn’t.  My boys laughing, yelling, chasing each other through the house, the dog running off after them, Garett asking, “Where’s that thingy?”.  All the life of my home…. gone.

Only the tapping of my fingers on the keyboard and the washer in its final spin making any noise.

People keep telling me I don’t need a man in my life …. Well, THIS is why I NEED a man in my life.  I’m LONELY.  I don’t want to live alone for years and years.  And why should I?  Because of what “they” will think.
Sorry.  I don’t care.  I want a man in my life and I’ll be ready whenever the universe crosses my path with his... because I WILL NOT be that biter crazy cat lady bitching about life.

I want a man.  A man to live with, hold, laugh with, love.  I miss it all and I want it again.
That doesn’t mean I’m pushing it to happen because although I was home alone, I didn’t call or text anyone. 

Even though I didn’t like it, I embraced the quiet… loneliness…faced it like a CHAMP... for one night anyway...let's not get crazy.

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