Becoming a mom changed my whole life. M was the perfect little baby. There was always a reason for his cries: hunger, dirty diaper, wanting attention. It was so easy being his mommy.
As he grew, I couldn't imagine loving anyone more than my heart loved him. I wanted another baby but I just couldn't see how my heart would let me love another little person as much as I loved M.
When I became pregnant with our second those worries came back. I have never heard of anyone feeling the same doubts. Still it wasn't until I was late in my pregnancy did I talk about them.
A friend had just given birth to her second child so I confided in her. She said she had felt the same exact way and not only until she saw her second child did it all go away... I hoped that would be true for me too.
After giving birth to C, they put him in my arms. I looked down into his little pink face and I fell in love all over again. My heart was so full of love for him I cried.
My baby boys (now 15 & 19) still fill my heart with love. Doubts gone forever. Never have I felt more love for one over the other.
I'm not proud of my doubts. I can't imagine our lives without C.
I just wanted to share with all those mommies of one who may wonder..."Do I have enough love for two?"
Because you do.