Saturday, August 29, 2009

Take the "How Rude Are You?" test at
My result was the following:
Miss Manners
You couldn't be more considerate if you were Emily Post herself. Motivational speaker Peggy Tabor Millin once said, "We never touch people so lightly that we do not leave a trace." You take that to heart and, in turn, inspire those around you to be the best they can be.
No. I didn't cheat. Although I do not consider myself "Miss Manners", I do consider myself considerate and respectful toward others... sometimes to a fault.

Friday, August 28, 2009

I work at a public school. This is my ninth school year. I've worked on the playground, in the kitchen, cafeteria, locker room, classrooms and office. I've worked in both the elementary and middle school buildings.I have recently changed my position AGAIN. I will be in a different building but working with familiar faces. It is 15 minutes less time per week. I will have the opportunity to sub a whole lot more.I just have this huge pit in my stomach as if I'm making the wrong choice.

he choice to change positions was mine. The woman I was working with is just too nuts for me to work with any longer. She talks badly about EVERYONE so I'm sure she talks badly about me as well. She gossips constantly about coaches/teachers/principals. She also noses around in student files at the high school level checking grades and rankings and sharing this information. I just do not want her bad habits to be blamed on me.Other than her, I love what I do and who I work with. I love the students and they like me. I know my job and do it well. I just do not want to be the fall guy when she is eventually caught being unprofessional.Did I make the wrong choice? Am I working against what the Lord wants for me? Wouldn't it be nice if that 8 ball we had as kids really worked?

UPDATE:  I made the move from the middle school building back to the elementary and I love it. It was a GREAT move.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

September is almost here and many changes are just around the corner.

M will be starting his first year of college. He will also be turning 18 mid September. He has decided to stay home and save money during this first year. He will be working during the football and baseball seasons for the teams' equipment manager. He received scholarships and monies for being valedictorian and other various achievements so he's pretty much set financially.

C will be starting his first year of high school. He will be turning 15 late November. He is taking a wood shop class. I'm glad. He really hasn't shown an interest in anything. I'm hoping he will like this... and make me some stuff. He will also be starting driver's training. I don't think we're ready for this.

Tyson will be getting his ears cropped. We're not sure when. Before he was to have them done, he had blood work done. It came back with low counts. So they put him on vitamins and meds. We have to see what happens from there.

There are changes for me regarding my job. Though at this time, I don't know what the outcome will be. No doubt I will find out at the very last minute. Ahh, the perks of working at a public school.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

This week I will be working on the following:

* Drink at least 60 oz of water daily - from 40 oz.
* Stop eating by 8:30pm - from 9pm.

I plan on posting pics. When? Who knows. I haven't worked up the courage yet.

Any weight loss tips would be GREATLY appreciated.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Tyson is now nine and a half weeks old. We have had him for two weeks.

He knows how to sit. He's working on stay - he does really good for the most part. Sometimes he comes when you say his name - sometimes he is distracted and that blade of grass seems like the most interesting thing in the world.

He has not had an accident in the house for the past 2 or 3 days. When he needs/wants to go outside he sits by the door. I can't remember how long it took Payton to be potty trained but I've read not to expect it until they are 3 or 4 months old.

Taking care of a puppy is so much like taking care of a baby. We get up twice during the night to let him go potty. Everyone has been lending a hand and doing their part. It makes things a little easier.

Tyson is now 17 pounds of sweet furry goodness. He is just delicious.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

The moment is so peaceful. Everyone is sleeping - even Tyson.

It's a bit gloomy out. (We had some storms last night) Everything is quiet. TV's off, no cell phones ringing, no running, or yelling. All is quiet and peaceful. I love these moments - knowing everyone is home and safe.

It hasn't been like this in a very long time. I'll enjoy it while it lasts, which can't be much longer it's 10:00am.

Hubby usually gets up at 5am even when he doesn't have to work. Tyson should be getting up soon too. Now two teen boys...they can sleep until 1:00/2:00 pm. (Hubby does not like that)

I think I'll go back to bed too.

What are your favorite moments?

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

It's that time again. I was not looking forward to this post. I did not have a successful week. It's ok though because I have my list of the many excuses in my mind ready to convince us all that it's ok and there's always tomorrow.

Really, I do have a list and I was ready to give you all my "legitimate" reasons for my lack of effort. I won't do that though because that's exactly what it was a great lack of effort.

I always tell my boys it takes zero effort to get an "F" on their report card so I NEVER want to see that (so far so good). I give myself an "F" this week. Damn, that sucks.

It's really hard to say that, to type that. But as I sit here I know I need to be honest. Honest to you. Honest to myself.

So where do I go from here? I was thinking I would not add another challenge this week but then I changed my mind.

So this week, in addition to what I should already be doing, I will be working on the following:
* Stop eating by 9:00 pm.

Just to let you know, I really DO NOT want to hit that "Publish Post" button.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Actually, I don't read Cosmo or Elle. I don't care what color is in season. I don't need any symbols on my cloths/makeup/children etc to show the world I'm living large. I don't need roses or diamonds. (My husband is happy about that one) To be honest I don't really get the "shoe" thing.

I've always called myself "Plain Jane". A couple of my fancy women friends take this as if I'm putting myself down and always make the, "No you're not" soothing voice to cheer me up. Uhhh, I kinda like me as I am. I don't feel as if it's a put down in any way at all. Low maintenance. That's me.

Don't get me wrong, I like doing my hair, waxing my brows, and putting on makeup. I just don't feel the need to do it
every day. As long as I have deodorant, I can get up and go no problem. In fact, I don't even wear makeup much during the summer.

Now, don't get pissed. I'm not knocking the fancy women of the world. I love my fancy woman friends and they love me.

I'm just saying, why do women beat on each other? So you get that symbol; those shoes. If that makes you happy great. Embrace who you are. Love yourself. Just as us "Plain Jane" women should.

Maybe I'm not girly because I have boys. Maybe God gave me boys because I'm not girly. Whatever. I like me.

Monday, August 17, 2009

As seen on TODAY - Dr. Nancy Snyderman (NBC News Chief Medical Editor) gives Swine Flu Survival tips:
  • Practice Good Hand Hygiene
  • Don't Share - viruses stay on hands and objects which are brought up to your face
  • Check Temperature - keep children with fever home
  • Stay Home - don't go to work/school sick - protect others
  • Hand Sanitizer - send with kids who may not be washing hands as well as you would like
  • Get Vaccinated - vaccine will be out in October
I work during the school year. I'm sure I wash my hands at least 10 times before I leave the house for work. As soon as I arrive I wipe down my phone, keyboard, mouse and desk with Clorox wipes. I also keep a bottle of hand sanitizer on my desk that I use frequently throughout the day.

I am a handwashing FREAK but really how easy is it to wash your hands the right way: water - soap - rub - rinse.

The boys (hubby too) do not listen or take advice unless it's on ESPN. Now if I could only get Brett Favre or Tiger Woods to do a PSA and demonstrate good hand hygiene I'd be set.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

I don't like talking on the phone much anymore. I am just so irritated by the lack of manners people have while talking on the phone.
It seems my friends and relatives with younger children are the biggest offenders. They half listen to anything I'm saying... that is unless it's them calling me at 3am with a mental breakdown or fight with their husband.
I'm going through a lot of shit here. It's my turn to need a shoulder to cry on.
Instead I'm on the phone with women who are yelling at their kids, talking to a cashier, leaving a drive-thru order or even sitting next to a friend and talking to them at the same time. Where are everyone's manners? Not to mention compassion.
Yes, I have had to interrupt a conversation but those are few and far between. I also make apologies for those. I do have friends with manners who will do the same.
I'm talking about those women who CONSTANTLY display this rude behavior. It is not only annoying but also hurtful.
The quote below makes me think maybe I have been giving my respect to those who just don't respect me.
Good manners are just a way of showing other people that we have respect for them.   ~Bill Kelly
Sometimes the best thing you can give someone is your time and attention. Next time you're talking to a friend don't forget they just may need you more than you know.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

I'm going to continue to walk everyday.

I am also going to start drinking more water.... who am I kidding with the "more". I'm going to start drinking water - at least 40oz of water each day.

You know for a few months there I was doing really great with the water thing. I was drinking 90-100 oz of water... and going to the bathroom A LOT. Drinking all that water helped me cut out the pop. It also made me full faster when eating.

What are your weight loss/maintenance tips?

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

We picked up our new puppy last night.
Although it was almost an hour drive, he took the ride home pretty well.

HE IS SOOO DAMN CUTE!!! Fourteen pounds of sweet furry goodness.

He's only had two accidents in the house.... I laughed both times. He urinated like a drop compared to Payton's small pond. Even his puppy poops are cute... maybe because they were outside.

We took him for a ride to get him some toys. This toy says "Twizzlers". I got it for him because I LOVE red Twizzlers. Sick, huh?

I think he loves his Twizzlers too.

It's funny how similar puppies and babies are. I feel as if I'm potty training the puppy the same way I did our boys... taking him to the "potty" every few hours, cutting him off beverages (well, water) at a certain time and giving him tons of praise for going potty like a big boy.

He has brought back the smiles and laughter to our home and I am so very grateful for that.

Monday, August 10, 2009

We were lucky enough to find someone with Doberman puppies. They only had three males left. I'm ok with that. I'm used to being surrounded by males.
We picked out our new pup but have yet to bring him home. Unlike with Payton, I had a very hard time finding just the right name.

Hubby and I have decided on Tyson. Hubby suggested the name Pyson but I like Tyson. Also, when I picked him up, he licked my face and nibbled my ear... he likes ears! Come on... is that a Tyson or what?
Our boys don't care for the name much but I figure they will be moving out before you know it so.... it's up to Hubby and me.
I am so excited. I can't wait to bring Tyson home and make him family.
Through all the excitement I have not forgotten my dear Payton. I miss him so much every day. His loss still hurts. The pain he went through still hurts. When I think of him, I still cry when I'm alone... hell even when I'm not alone. (It's really annoying to people but I don't give a fuck.)
A cute new puppy will not take away the love I will always feel for Payton but I'm hoping it will help with the emptiness.
Because of all the moving while growing up, I didn't have a pet (for that long anyway). I had Payton in my life longer then any other furry friend. Maybe that's why I turned into the Doberman freak I am today.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

So many changes have happened in the last year. It's been very emotional.

I don't like change... I think more so than the average person. I had SO much change as a child I don't like anything rocking my world. I went to several schools, lived in several houses and was tossed between two states. I lived with both parents. I lived with my mom - no dad. I lived with my dad - no mom. (more on that later.... maybe)

Through all the crap that's been going on I am still grateful.

I'm grateful for:
  • Hubby, boys and their good health
  • Extended family - love you Paulette
  • Hubby has a job
  • I have a job during the school year
  • Our oldest will have a job in the fall
  • I had Payton for seven wonderful years
  • We have a home
  • We have somewhat working vehicles
  • None of our utilities have been turned off
  • Being chosen by as one of their Featured Writers for "CNN Can Shove It Too" - (that's right, I'm tooting that horn)
Most of all, I'm grateful to God for always carrying me. You need only ask once and He will be there for you even when you think He's not.

Just as we do with our children, I believe we do not always like the lessons He teaches us. Just as with our children, those lessons are the best thing for us.

Have a safe and happy weekend.

Friday, August 7, 2009

If you know me in person or have been reading my blog; you know we recently lost our seven year old Doberman (Payton) to bone cancer.
We looked at dobie pups and decided to get one. I know. We're nuts. More crazy... we'd take two pups if we had the cashola.
We will be picking him up Monday and have not come to a decision about the name.
I actually came up with the name Payton. We are football lovers so we named him after Walter Payton.
So does anyone have a good name for a male Doberman pup?

Thursday, August 6, 2009

I was chosen by as one of their Featured Writers for my article CNN Can Shove It Too. CNN Can Shove It Too was posted on this blog on July 17, 2009.
I hope you enjoy it as much as they did.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

When a smoker decides to stop smoking they remove cigarettes from their lives. When an alcoholic decides to stop drinking they remove alcohol from their lives. The first thing these addicts do is remove all the cigarettes or alcohol from their home.

When a person has an eating disease they cannot remove all food from their lives. Food cannot just be removed and avoided. At least three times a day we need to face our addiction, making sure to take just a little bit of our "drug". Can a smoker take just one puff? An alcoholic one sip?

You may think I'm going too far, being too dramatic. You must be healthy. I was once healthy too. I started gaining my weight slow and steady after the birth of our second child. I'm only 4'11" and am now carrying a whole lotta weight. It's not a matter of looking just so anymore. I really need to get healthy.

At this time I do not have high blood pressure, diabetes or any other problems that obese people have. I feel blessed about that but I know it's only a matter of time.

I've tried to lose weight before with some success. Eventually I'd give up because the weight wouldn't come off fast enough or a million other excuses I don't have time to type.

Now I'm going to try something new... I'm announcing to everyone (well, anyone who will read this) my desire to lose weight. Well, I hope to lose weight anyway. Maybe the fear of public failure will be just what I need.

Typing this post alone is a huge step for me. It really is embarrassing. I'm trying not to picture all the faces of family and friends reading this... not to mention any faces I've never seen before.

Although I can really pack it away at times, I think my biggest problem is I don't move. So there's where I will start. Starting today I will take a 30 minute walk every day.

My Plan: Every Wednesday I will post an update... successful or not.

My Weekly Weight Loss Challenge: take 30 minute walk everyday.

Wish me luck, People, here I go... again.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Things have been just thing after another. Yesterday was a very emotional day. Actually, it's been an emotional roller coaster since... well, I don't know how long. (Have I mentioned I don't like roller coasters?)

I felt slowly but surly things would get back to normal. Whatever "normal" is... it's been so long, I just don't know anymore. I had a good visit with my father. We rescued Cooper. Our oldest was finally safe at home after being across the country for over a week. Hubby, our youngest and I had a pretty good week. Hubby was on vacation and although we didn't go anywhere special, we were happy together.

Then the past few days all shit started braking loose. My father went back home without even saying goodbye. (still have to find out what that was about) Our oldest came home with major attitude. Our youngest got an ear infection and was in constant pain. Cooper bit our youngest and went back and forth from being sweet to growling and snapping. Hubby had enough with the arrogance
of the oldest and told him to knock it off. (Hubby is VERY laid back. It takes a lot to get him pissed.) I got upset with the disrespectful way the oldest was being and had a HUGE blowup telling him so.

Early yesterday afternoon I decided to get out for a bit and take Cooper to get gas in the car. After paying for the gas, I went to get into the car and Cooper starts growling at me. WTF! Doesn't this dog know all we want is to give him love, comfort, a home, a family? That was it. I had made too many excuses for him. I realized that this situation was not good for him or our family. We needed to take him back.

Our youngest was so hurt. He knew the dog couldn't stay with us but he didn't want to send him back to the SPCA. (Although our youngest holds his emotions close he is very sensitive.)

I felt all eyes on me as Cooper and I stepped into the office. I felt like a failure. Why couldn't we make this work? All this little dog needed was more time, love, security. He was so sweet as we walked in, wagging his little tail and I swear that dog was smiling, happy to be back "home".

Yesterday was awful! It was full of yelling and crying. I cried for Cooper. I cried for Payton. I cried for our boys. I cried for our family. I cried and cried and cried.

Although I didn't know it yesterday, I feel it was the right decision. We're not ready for another dog. We need a puppy. A puppy with a clean slate who can get to know us and we him/her. There will NEVER be another Payton. We are all one of a kind. I still hope that we can find that furry friend for our family and I'll wait until I find those eyes I just can't walk away from.

I have always talked of gratefulness, God's Will and tomorrow being a new day to start fresh. This may have finally stuck to the boys. This morning they both did their chores without a reminder. We had a good breakfast and everyone picked up after themselves. No arguments. No back talk. No rolling of the eyes.

Today there was no more talk of yesterday...that will only lead to more arguments. We will talk with love and leave the yelling for football season.
Today has been as normal as things have been for a very long time....and I'll take it.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Early last week we went to our local SPCA to take a look at some dogs. I was expecting to just fall in love. I was waiting for that connection. To see a face I couldn't live without. I didn't find that.

Still I filled out an adoption application just so I would be ready to take my new furry friend soon as I met him.

Yesterday, hubby and I took our youngest to take another look around. The love arrow did not strike me but it did strike hubby and our son. They fell for a mini pincher. He has spent most of his life (2.5 yrs) there.

What kind of life was that? I felt bad for him. So we took him home.

There will be some getting used to on both sides. He has to get used to all things new. There are new smells, new sounds and new faces. We have to get used to his personality.

It's only been 24 hrs but we're all hopeful. I want this will be good for him and our boys.

I definitely know Cooper is not Payton. There is not a connection there. Maybe later. I still miss my Payton each and everyday. I still cry. How long will this hurt?