Thursday, July 16, 2009

Out Numbered

I am surrounded by testosterone. My husband, the boys even the dog.

The husband and the boys I wanted, the dog not so much. My husband is the one who wanted him. "The boys have to grow up with a dog," he said. So after much conversation and research we decided on a Doberman.

On the way home from picking up the new pup, I drove home. I would distance myself from the get go. I was NOT going to take care of it. He wanted the dog for the boys so he and the boys would be 100% responsible.

You know what's coming right?

My plan didn't last long. He would not stop crying until I put my hand on him (in the backseat) while I drove. That night he cried. I woke up, put him on my chest and comforted him. It felt as if I was back in time nursing my infant in the middle of the night. It was the same the next two nights but that really didn't matter. After that first night I was in love.

Seven years later, he follows me everywhere. He sleeps at the foot or side of my bed. He is the best company. He'll watch whatever I want. He never picks on me when I'm "acting like a girl" or being "over emotional". He is the first one to show sympathy when my estrogen starts acting up. Believe me the rest of them are happy about that one.

Now my Dobe is sick. I took him to the vet. I bawled the whole time I was there. I think I freaked out...well, everyone there. It has kinda surprised me how much I've been falling apart. I know I love him. I guess I didn't know how much. It just hurts to see him so miserable.

The boys used to ask who was in charge of the dog in case of fire/tornado. Joking I would say he is. He needs to follow quickly or get left behind. We would not wait for him and NO ONE was to go back for the dog.

The vet thinks it may be bone cancer. She kept him over night last night. She wants him again today. I miss him so much. I've had my husband in the hospital and both my boys had surgery. That pit in my stomach is back. It won't go away until he's home.

He needs to come home. Someone go back for the dog! My estrogen is acting up again!

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