Tuesday, July 14, 2009

16 and Pregnant

FYI, I had our oldest three weeks before I turned 21. It could have been much earlier as no one ever had "the talk" with me. (God has always been with me even when I didn't know Him) I set rules for myself and was successful at keeping them. Btw, although I wanted to have children young (after 21) I really didn't know how young.

When should you have "the talk"? We never had "the talk". We've had several talks from the get go. We used proper names for body parts. We answered questions as they came up as honestly as possible - you don't want to freak out a five year old you know. You also don't want to bore them - they don't care about your tubes.

We had the stinky pit talk. What changes to expect and it was ok to feel weird about it all. I also encouraged them to talk to one of us with any concerns about what was "normal".

Which "side" would I teach - safe sex/wait for marriage? After much conversation with God, I decided to encourage the following:

  • Not to rush into sex just because everyone else is active.
  • Oral sex (giving or receiving) is still sex - and at risk for disease.
  • Do not "hook up" (teen talk for sex) with random girls - if she can do that with you, how many other times has she done this?
  • Wrap it up - you could get something you can't get rid of and bring disease to your future wife.
  • Wrap it up - even if she say's it's ok, she's covered (she could lie) - you are responsible for you.
  • Wrap it up - you don't need to put yourselves in a place to make hard decisions if she became pregnant.

Yes, It was I who did all the talking while hubby sat nodding his head. I told my son that as much as he was embarrassed by the words that were coming out of my mouth - I was just as traumatized.... and I would have to say it again to his brother.

I have been over these subjects many times. I mean I had to tell Hubby a zillion times before he finally got that toilet seat thing down so I figure I better keep reminding his mini yeahoos. I think it's something in the testosterone.

Must see..."16 and Pregnant". It's a series on MTV. It follows a young pregnant girl around. It doesn't glorify teen pregnancy or discourage (purposely).
It seems an honest window in time. Showing both the optimism and excitement of being a new mom and the harsh reality that is the hardest, thankless job any woman (or man for that matter) can have.

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